Cooley2here ( member #62939) posted at 12:37 PM on Saturday, December 7th, 2024
Alec, sadly, your story is so common there are thousands and thousands of bs, many on here, so your "secret" is safe. You have not disclosed enough info for anyone to find you.
Just take care of yourself. This is trauma you are still dealing with and even if you never comment again you might find some help reading here.
When things go wrong, don’t go with them. Elvis
4characters ( new member #85657) posted at 8:51 PM on Tuesday, January 7th, 2025
I found the OP (and the conversations that followed) to be incredibly helpful.
Icedover84 ( member #82901) posted at 7:24 PM on Wednesday, January 8th, 2025
Alec, after I found out my wife had stepped out on me, I had a weird crisis of self and a lot of internalized anger. While reconciling, at some point I found myself starting to choke and slap her during sex. It started out of me wanting to hurt her for what she'd done to me. But it turned out she liked it.
I don't know how that helps you, but if you find yourself getting intimate with her, push her limits and see what you can get away with. It might not help the marriage, but it might help you feel less emasculated.
(I don't condone violence or misogyny, and therapy has been helpful - I guess I just found a way to turn rage into a kink)
