Formerpeopleperson
"At the risk of belaboring this, that’s exactly what I’m trying to say. The BS is the prize. Isn’t it nice for the WS to recognize that, and choose the BS?
Cheaters don’t "choose" the affair partner or the spouse. They choose themselves. Every single time.
There is no win for anyone here because someone who can harm others to feed their own ego or desires is not making a choice that one can or should feel good about.
Infact anyone who chooses themselves at someone else’s expense — and is never corrected —will do it again and again. It’s a pattern, not a love story. Whoever they are with will face its aftermath sooner or later.
Only thing a WS can do is show that are worthy of being a good partner and it’s up to the BS then to accept them.
Also Pick-me energy assumes the other person is capable of valuing you — or anyone. They aren’t.
They value only what serves them. And no one can sustain that, because it’s not a relationship —it’s a setup where your role is to keep meeting their needs.